Psychology says that children try to do all the things that they believe would have rescued their parents. I cannot express how painfully true this theory is. Without realizing, I have been working hard at my studies, scrambling for internship and staying away from romantic relationships- because I don’t want to end up trapped in the four walls of the kitchen like my mother.
She was a young, beautiful and ambitious woman who grew up in a backward Indian village. Then she moved to the city to focus on her career but her family married her off to my father. Now, I know this sounds like a tragic story but my father was very open-minded and encouraged her to do whatever she felt right. But circumstances can cripple any champion, so after years of cooking for a family, taking care of her two children and attempting to satisfy her in-laws, her spirit got lost in the four walls of our house. I don’t blame her, I don’t blame anyone. I simply feel that it was unfair and if given a chance, she would have achieved great heights. But honestly, I genuinely love my mother. Whether she thinks of herself as a failure, I believe she is a fantastic wife and a supportive mother. One thing she didn’t fail at is raising us to follow our dreams. I know there are times when we all feel a little dejected and disappointed in ourselves, so here is a list of 10 reasons why my mother is awesome.
- Mom, you are freaking beautiful– Obviously after giving birth to two children you will be overweight and after sleeping for only four hours everyday you will have dark circles. But your face is the first thing I see every morning, and trust me I freaking love it. Your soft smile and sweet voice make my day. Dad thinks you’re freaking beautiful too, he is just too shy to say it!
- You’re sweet to everyone– I know you think that you have a habit of yelling all the time (You do). But whenever we have guests at our house, or if you are meeting my friends or dad’s colleagues, you are so respectful and lovely with them. Countless times, my friends have told me that you are very sweet but I never really told you. Maybe I didn’t think it was important, but now I think it was.
- You are amazing with kids– I honestly love the way your attention naturally gravitates towards a baby and you make funny faces and play with them. I love how you talk to them in weird baby language that only the two of you understand. I don’t remember anything of the time when I was a baby, but I wish I did so I would know how much fun we had when I couldn’t even talk.
- You are very open-minded– In a country like India where having a relationship is qualified as ‘ruining the family name’ you always encouraged me and my brother to be modern. You asked us to be honest with you and in turn you promised that you will understand. I love that we have a transparent relationship and that we completely trust each other. You never bombarded us with orthodox thoughts but at the same time you taught us to be focused on our ambitions.
- You are a great cook– Okay I admit, I sometimes complain about how your ‘roti’ is a bit too roasted or how your rice isn’t fluffy enough. But I honestly love your food. I remember how I used to open my tiffin in school during lunch time and how all my class-mates would jump to eat your food. They always complimented your cooking skills. No matter how much I love Chicken McGrill Burgers, there is nothing more delicious than your dal-rice with papad.
- You and Dad have an awesome friendship– I admit I am one of those silly, ridiculous hopeless romantics who is seduced by the idea of fairy-tale relationships. But seeing how yours and Dad’s was an arranged marriage and yet you are so supportive and caring about each other, I have realized that a lasting friendship is more reliable than a romance that lasts one summer.
- You are funny– Have I ever told you this? Holy shit, you are funny mom! You are so funny, you always make me laugh like crazy. I love how you, me and dad team up and tease brother about how he doesn’t get any female attention. I love how life is easy-going and effortless with you. You are funny mom, you are hilarious!
- You taught me to believe in kindness– Sometimes I get furious with you because you have a terrible habit of helping those who hate you. I don’t see the logic of why you would want to be there for those who have only tried to create problems in your family life. But watching you give them a helping hand has made me realized that you are selfless and kind, unlike them. From watching you I learned that I too should be kind to those who are in difficult situations.
- You are an independent woman– You are not one of those housewives who always ask their husbands permission for everything. You are a strong-willed, fierce and passionate woman who makes her own decisions. Favourite feminist icon? YOU! Biggest inspiration? YOU! Best friend? YOU! My hero? YOU!
- You are my best friend– I don’t know how many 18 year old girls have the privilege of saying this but you are my best friend. You are always there for my when I need you. You are my support when I feel weak, you are my companion when I’m lonely and you always tell me that everything is going to be okay. Honestly mom, you’re the best!
I wish I was more loving and caring towards you, but I am not one of those people who express their emotions directly. So I am writing this post which you will probably never read and thinking about what gift I should give you on Mother’s Day. But nothing I can give you, no matter how thoughtful or expensive will ever be enough to fully thank you. Mom, you are fucking awesome and I love you ❤